A loksevi should not criticize or gossip when interacting with people. Even if the intention is to bring about positive change, people may take offense. They may take it personally and irrationally presume the loksevi to be an enemy. For example, to say “you are absolutely wrong; why you did such a bad thing?” will only make people feel dejected, even if the intention was only to point out a mistake. It would be better to say “you probably were not aware this was a risky proposition and you suffered from that misunderstanding. It’s better to be more careful.” Then, if needed, guidance for correcting the mistake could be offered.
However, such conversations should never take place in public. The loksevi should talk with the person in private, where he should take care to not say anything which might sound negative or demoralizing. Also, whenever possible, effort should be made to highlight and appreciate the positive qualities of the person, even when making suggestions. After all, anyone willing to offer his services for a noble cause must already have some good intentions in his heart. Appreciation and public recognition will inspire him to strengthen these positive elements even further.
A loksevi, however, should be careful not to shower excessive praise on someone. Unwarranted appreciation can cross the line into flattery and may provoke a person to develop false pride. The difference between praise and flattery is the same as that between nectar and poison. Appreciation inspires a person to proceed on the path of progress, while flattery may result in making him arrogant, thereby misleading him and even causing his downfall. There is a fine line between praise and flattery. Appreciating someone’s positive qualities and dedication qualifies as praise. This motivates the person to nurture these qualities even more. Flattery conveys a notion of superiority by comparing the person with an inferior individual.
Therefore it is important not to compare a person with anyone else when praising him. This helps motivate him and lead him in the right direction. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. It is difficult even for a loksevi to achieve total perfection all the time. It is natural for a person to work on his weaknesses, but it does not give him pleasure when they are discussed in public. It is important for a loksevi not to direct any personal criticisms towards someone. A general analysis of improvements observed in someone’s behaviour may be acceptable, but when the comments are personally directed at an individual, it may make him bitter. A loksevi can be more effective when pointing out areas in need of improvement is done along with highlighting a person’s positive qualities.
Along with courtesy and an inspiring and appreciative attitude, a loksevi must exhibit patience while interacting with people. It is true that he needs to take his message to the world, but the public views him only as a representative and guide. They expect him to listen patiently to their problems, understand them, and suggest solutions. The loksevi needs to be patient and be willing to listen to them, rather than only focusing on conveying his message. The message a loksevi is trying to popularize can be conveyed effectively only when people are ready to listen to him.
Source: Guidelines for the Aspiring Loksevi
